Menstrual Mania

Funny Photo Jokes

administrator — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 06:22:03 +0000

Aside from the fact this is totally amusing, FlipMyText.com has a great tool for creating your own “For Dummies” books. I played with this tool for hours creating all kinds of books and sending them out to my friends. Instead of using the code they provide, I just did a screenshot of the book and then cropped it in my photo editor, so that I could send them a Jpeg through mail. See the book I created below. This book I made as a funny photo joke to send to my friends. I told them I was an internet millionaire because I created a new book that is sweeping the nation by surprise. It was more of a Christmas gag, since I didn’t have time to send out my Christmas Cards. My friends are use to this kind of crap since they know my level of humor. This funny photo joke caught them by surpise and had them rolling on the floor for quite some time. The original title of the book was actually, ” How I Filled My Rectum with Play-Doh and Lived to Tell About It” Obviously this didn’t work for a title on the book, it was too long. You should try this yourself, you can have your friends laughing for days. The site that creates these books is at: http://www.flipmytext.com/generators/dummies/

FlipMyText for Dummies

Bernie Mac Dies From Pneumonia

administrator — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 18:31:04 +0000

Bernie Mac, the beloved comedian and one of the, “Original Kings of Comedy dies from Pneumonia. His roll in “Oceans Eleven” and sequals also brought alot of attention his amazing talent. More recently, he became widely know for his TV Show, “The Bernie Mac Show” It’s almost hard to believe he is gone. When I heard the news it was personally very shocking. As I understand, Bernie was only 50 years old. He suffered in early 2000 from a lung disease called, sarcoidosis, an inflammatory lung disease that produces tiny lumps of cells in the body’s organs. Apparently it went into remission in 2005 and is not related to his recent struggle with Pneumonia. One of my favorite films and also a very popular one was, “Guess Who” with Ashton Kutcher. This film was a remake of the Spender Tracy and Katharine Hepburn drama, “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner”

He was very talented and I know inspired alot of people. He was my favorite, in the “The Original Kings of Comedy” and it is sad to see him go. At 50 years old, you just begin to really enjoy all that life has to give. He built a great legacy for his family and won’t be around to enjoy it. My thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends who had to see him go. We’ll miss you Bernie Mac.

Fat People Don’t Die in Prison

administrator — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 05:38:55 +0000

One of my favorite news stations is KTLA, and this morning they covered a story that just almost brought me to tears. Not tears of sadness, but tears of laughter. This story is totally real no joke. A man in prison who rapped and killed two woman apparently lives after he was sentenced to death. His fat is keeping him alive. Apparently they wanted to execute him 5 years ago, but could not find a vein to give him an injection. Missing the vein could have adverse effects that make the procedure too risky. There are also concerns that the legal dosage would not have the right effect because of his weight. So basically he can’t die, because he is too fat.

This was the real story and it was almost hard to believe. It really makes you wonder if it is just the Fat Man making this up or if legally this is true. I think the Fat Guy is a lier and is just afraid to die. I had trouble tacking the story down on the KTLA website, so here is the link to the full Yahoo story.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080805/ap_on_re_us/death_penalty_cooey

If you could be a little more like Jesus.

administrator — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 18:09:11 +0000

What would you do if you could be a little more like Jesus?

What would you sing if you could sing a little more like Jesus?

How would you feel if you were a little more sexy like Jesus?

Who would you do if you were a little more like Jesus?

What would you buy if you were a little more rich like Jesus?

Who would you kiss if you could kiss a little more like Jesus?

What would you eat, if you could taste a little more like Jesus?

Have more to add… let us know!

5 Things To Do Before You Die

administrator — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 06:40:39 +0000

Tell Your Wife or Girl Friend you want to have sex one last time.
Tell a bad “Knock Knock Joke”
Piss freely in random locations
Have sex with a little person, (no it’s really cool)
Get piss-ass drunk and wake up naked with the words, “I’m Gay” written on your forehead in permanent ink.

The Best Nintendo Wii Game Ever

administrator — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 16:06:31 +0000

The hottest thing that I have ever seen in Gaming ever. Finally a game that allows anyone, including women to control a digital Penis. No joke, just watch the video below. I couldn’t believe this when I saw it. I wonder how many dudes are actually playing this game. Is it American’s behind the creation of the game or the Japaneses, I’ll let you decide. I think I would feel a bit strange if I had to go into the the store and buy and extra Penis in the event that the original broke from access control. Apparently there have been a few cases where players actually swung too hard and the penis flew off the strap and put a hole in the TV. I think there should be a rule that requires women to be naked when playing this game. There’s nothing hotter than a naked chick with a strap-on, just kidding, that’s horrible. Shut up! Seriously though, would you really want to spend hard earned money on a digital penis. If it doubled as a real vibrator, more people would consider it, but for now it is only a game, not a sexual friend.

Jesus Is Not Real

administrator — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 18:26:36 +0000

Are you stupid? That is the question Jesus would ask you if he alive.

If you dare answer “NO”, he would kick you right in the F!@#& Nuts! If you are a girl, he would still kick you in the nuts. Shut up!

The truth of the matter is, the bible has been rewritten more than 50 times in the last 500 years. I’m really sure how sacred the Bible is any more. The whole concept of religion has been abused time and time again. Even the Priests that we have grown to love, have disobeyed and abused the privileges they’ve been given. How many stories have we heard about a Pastor who molests young children, or is secretly having love affairs behind closed doors? If you can’t trust people who say they are “A Man of Good” who can you trust? Definitely not the Police, they are just as bad. When anyone is given power, it is only Human to abuse it.

Look at all the Celebrities for example, they have money and power and they abuse it. They turn into coke heads, drink and drive, have babies when they are underage, hire prostitutes, and the list goes on.

This world is ugly, so you better learn how to fight. When times are bad and no one cares about you, the only person who will fix your situation is you. You can hope, dream, pray all you want, but until you start taking action, nothing in your life is going to change.

Stop thinking so much about people that don’t physically exists, like Jesus, and start thinking about the people that do exist. What could you do if you paid more attention to the people around you? How many people would be alive and well today if they just took more time to focus on what is important in life, rather than hoping and praying things would get better. I hate to tell you, but hoping and praying is just an excuse to feel better about yourself. As long as you keep hoping, you’ll be okay without not taking action. Open your eyes because opportunity is always knocking on your door, it’s not Jesus. If you don’t take action, even Jesus can’t help you.

3 Reason Why I Love Blowjobs

administrator — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 22:36:09 +0000

Any girl or woman may wonder what is so special about blowjobs. Well, any man can answer that simple question. There really isn’t much explaining to do.

Why do love blowjobs? Hmmmm, lets think about that one. A girl’s warm mouth on my junk?

1. I LOVE getting head.

2. I LOVE getting head.

3. I LOVE getting head.

What else is there to say, that explains it, pretty clear I think.

Automated Confession Booth.

administrator — Tue, 15 Jul 2008 22:32:00 +0000

I had the best idea today, an Automated Confession Booth. Basically, it has an oversized, gigantic boxing glove attached. The boxing glove would have the words, “I forgive you” painted in white on the front of the glove.” When you sit down to confess, you only need to say how you screwed up in life and Jesus will knock the living shit out of you, so you remember not so screw up next time. I’m going to set this up at the next LA fair and dress up like a priest and ask people to confess. I won’t won’t actually tell them about the boxing glove though. I like the shock factor.

Puppet Love

administrator — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 21:33:37 +0000

When you need a little help from your friends, Puppet love is what you need. He doesn’t care if you are happy, sad, angry or depressed, he will always find a way to make you laugh until you bleed.